It’s a beautiful sunny day.
Not a cloud in the sky.
The birds are singing, and the grass is green.
A typical day for this time of the year.
Everyone seems to be happy except for me.
I am in a foul mood.
It’s not anger, although it may have started as anger.
Is it frustration?
More like a depression.
A continual stream of negative thoughts flowing through my mind.
It’s now lunchtime and I know my mood will start to dissipate soon.
Maybe coffee will lighten my mood.
I go to a café and buy a coffee.
Medium Cappuccino with one sugar.
I sit in the corner by myself.
What triggered this emotional tidal wave?
Did I just wake up this way?
Was it the tiff I had with my partner last night?
Did I drink too much last night?
Am I tired? Could be.
My energy levels were off this morning.
The kids frustrated me during breakfast. Was that it?
I suffered a bit of commuter rage on the way to work.
Was that it?
No, I was in this mood before then.
Was it just the fact that I had to come to work today?
I overheard somebody say, “Don’t go near him, he is in one of those moods again”.
Am I like this often?
I guess I am.
I know I don’t have to stay in this mood.
I can change it in an instant.
I am in control of my thoughts although you wouldn’t think so today.
At the moment, I am allowing my negative thoughts to control my thinking.
What I’m focused on is the problem.
And I know how to change that.
Because, if I…
Change my thoughts, I change my mood.
Have you ever felt this way?
I’ve been there many times. Used to live there, in fact.
The good news is that I learned how to change my mood and so can you.
The first thing you need to do is interrupt your pattern of thinking.
Change your Actions. Change your Feelings.
Do a mood interrupt.
It’s been scientifically proven that your physiology powerfully impacts your feelings.
In his book Are You Up For The Challenge, Rod Hairston teaches that changing your body language and your physiology will change your mood.
A smile, for example.
Fact. You can’t be sad at the same time as being happy.
Having trouble forcing yourself to smile?
Put a pencil between your teeth and go look in the mirror.
Even if you’re not feeling happy, your muscles are creating a smile and your brain will respond.
Next, you need to change your focus.
Change Your Focus. Change your Mood.
Rod Hairston also teaches the principle of The Four Laws of Focus:
1. What you focus on you find.
2. What you focus on seems real.
3. What you focus on grows.
4. What you focus on you become.
If you look for negative things going on in your life, you will find them.
You will notice more and more negative outcomes.
Your world will become a chain of negative episodes.
You are having a bad day. Then, it seems like you’re having a bad life.
If you replace negative above with positive then…
YOU ARE HAVING A FANTASTIC DAY!
But how do you do that?
I quite often use a song from my top 100. I will whistle one of them if I can’t play one.
- Good Vibrations by the Beach Boys.
- Lady In Red by Chris DeBurgh.
- Ride On Time by Black Box
What other ways can you interrupt your thinking to change your focus?
- Go for a walk
- Look for something beautiful in your environment and concentrate on that for 5 minutes.
- Google funny jokes
- Ask someone to tell you a joke
- Google “comedians” and watch one of their videos.
- Go for a coffee with a friend and talk about something positive
- Retail therapy might work if you not adding to your financial woes.
- Call someone who is fun and makes you happy.
- Read a chapter of a book
- Go on Facebook and spread some love on your friends’ posts
- Listen to some music
- Read the cartoons in the paper
- Do a crossword
- Solve a Sudoku puzzle
- Sit outside:
- Listen to the birds. Can you identify them?
- What objects can you see in the clouds
- What can you smell?
- Do you feel the breeze on your face? Is it warm or cool?
- Are you eating? What does it taste like? What’s the texture?
For more ideas, check out 12 Easy Fast Meditation Techniques — No Experience Needed.
Write a list of 20 things you can do to change your mood.
Then practice them.
Not everything is going to go your way every day, but if you focus on the positives then the negatives just become a little speed bump.
You get to choose what you focus on.
I love this quote:-
“Feel the feeling, but don’t become the emotion. Witness it, Allow it. Release it.”
— Crystal Andrus
You can train yourself to live this quote. And when you do, life is awesome.
It changes your whole perspective on life.
So, do you want to stay in your old depressive moods?
It’s your choice.
Just know that, if you do, you’re allowing external events to control your emotions.
And you will continue to be a victim to them, cultivating pathways of self-sabotage.
Will you choose to live happily by changing your focus?